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Prequel to a suicide note

Eh Jude,

Given the dire circumstances I find myself in, here, now, this message begins to feel like practice for a suicide note. I just don't know where to begin only that my head pounds with the problems I'm downing in. Debt, joblessness, divorce and eviction. Things in my life took a turn for the worse when I found out that I would not be getting the last six months of unemployment. I've been out of work for the last year and a half and have not had a sit down interview for over six months. Even my recruiters won't call me back. The message I'm getting is that this economy can get by with one less office manager. My wife has threatened to divorce me after months of telling me how disgusting I am for not being able to provide for my family.

I've exhausted the good will of relatives, friends and all my job recruiters. A man cannot live by platitudes alone. The whole situation just sickens me and I can see no way out. Even the suicide prevention hotline is of no use. I need help and I'm getting to the end of my rope real quick and it's tied in the shape of a noose. Please, Jude, can you help me?



Dear Useless,

Since you are leaning toward ending your life, why not consider it terminated already? Death relieves you from having to face the myriad of difficulties you described--from the petty to the ultra serious. What importance do they serve when you've silenced your life?

Who's your wife going to divorce now? What employer will pass you over for a job? Your life no longer hangs on the whims or opinions of others. What I'm suggesting is that you have to live your life as if you just survived suicide. It serves as a shock to one's senses. Assumptions and beliefs must endure a shakedown.

Having survived suicide, you are now free to push the reset button for your journey. You have to use this occasion to re-evaluate your goals and talents, especially reconsider how you relate to yourself in every waking moment--this includes your body language like posture and the mood your countenance reveals. Hiring managers are reading these cues as carefully as they might sift through your resume.

The new, limitless you no longer accepts being pinned down by whatever harrowing troubles you endured. And of course none of them go away. But how you handle them stands the chance of a robust renewal.

While the economy had been imploding over the last five years, lots of people got busy exploring the shifting landscape for new foundations to build upon. Intuition is crucial at a time like this. What opportunity is out there wating for you to seize it? What unspoken career wish went unheeded while you held down a job? Don't you deserve the satisfaction of doing work you enjoy?

However dark the day becomes, never forget that it is your life's instinct to fight for survival; and you have honored that instinct by reaching out.


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    Response: Separation Anxiety
    Prequel to a suicide note - Advice - Jude Folly

Reader Comments (2)

Great advice...

January 13, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermsbpodcast

Hey there, I want you to know that what your wife tells you and what the world seems to be telling you, is not true. It is not true what so ever. No one in this world deserves to die through suicide. You, along with everyone else in this physical world, were put here for a real PURPOSE. You DO have a purpose. You are meant to go through a lot of bullshit and learn a very unique and valuable lesson. I just recently got arrested and am being charged with 3 felonies... It was all because of something so small and so stupid. I also have severe social anxiety disorder which prevents me from living a regular day to day life. Yet I know that these things that are terrible and happening to me, are just because they are meant to. They are happening because I need to learn a lesson from all of it. Just because you do not know what the lesson is right now, does not mean that there isn't one. I promise you that everything is happening for a reason. First off you need to take a step back and realize that you are not alone in this. Secondly, the things your wide tells you is all part of your unhealthy relationship. I have been in plenty to know one when I see it. And being out of them, I can tell you that it is NOT worth it. You need to evaluate the people and things in your life that are making your mindset negative. Just because you do not have a job, WHICH IS NOT YOUR FAULT, does NOT make you worthless or disgusting or anything like that. FUCK HER for saying that that is completely wrong!! You are an AMAZING person, I am taking time out of my day to write to you and I do not even know you. Yet I know you are wonderful and amazing, and intelligent and kind. You do not need to feel so insignificant. Jobs are SO hard to come by. As long as you are continuously searching then everything will fall into place. No matter how long it may take. See, it is not the fact that you are succeeding or not, it is the fact that you are honestly trying. And if your wife doesn't like the things you try to do for your family, then fuck her. It is disrespectful and wrong of her to treat you in such a way. You WILL find a job, and you WILL be happy. It is all about the mindset, I am telling you, I PROMISE. It is all in your mind, if you are positive and always happy and always understanding of the problems you face and you can reason with your mind, finding out why these things are happening; then good things will happen to you. Sometimes people need a bad thing to occur for them to really understand who they are. You need to get out of an unhealthy relationship and focus on your inner self, Your inner self seems very very off balance. You just need to realign your psyche to your body. Do some yoga, go in the woods and meditate. Everything is going to be just fine, it will turn our wonderfully once you start believing it will. You deserve to be happy and you need to work on your relationship with your wife or kick her to the curb! Just try to look for a job EVERYWHERE, look presentable and go in with a huge smile on your face and a wonderful attitude. I know you can do it !! :). I believe in you, everyone is here for a reason and if you tale your life you will never find out what that reason is. You will just have to start all over again but it won't be easy, since you decided to end your life. If that makes sense. I hope this helps, I love you, you kind beautiful soul. You deserve to live and to be happy, to breathe the fresh air and relax. If I were you, I would look for a job at every building in the whole town, you are bound to find something. The perfect job will fall right into your lap, you just need to truly believe that things are going to work out for the good. Because they are. I PROMISE, with all my being that everything will work out. Do NOT let negative words effect your mindset. You are YOU, and there is no one else out there alike to you. You are unique in every way and so is your life. Everyone's life is a long journey, and you are going to come across trouble every now and again. I know for a fact a lot of insurance agencies and such need receptionists and office managers. The perfect job is out there for YOU. Sometimes you need to settle for something not perfect, cuz your perfect job will not just magically appear, you have to search for it. Go through a few shitty jobs before you find the great one. You just CAN NOT GIVE UP!!! WHATEVER YOU DO, NEVER EVER GIVE UP!!!!!! :D. I believe in you, I really hope you choose to balance yourself and not take your own life. I love you, kind gentle marvelous being. Please, stay positive. I hope this helps a lot <3. YOU CAN DO IT :D!!!!
I you need to email me for support or advice do not hesitate !

March 7, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJust A Simple Soul

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